2020 Word of the Year: LOVE

I thought about this for the entire month of January (and a little bit before). I know it seems ironic considering what I went through last year in the “love” department, but when I kept mulling it over, it just felt right, so I started thinking about all of the other things it could mean. Yes, 2019 brought me a broken engagement and a broken heart, but LOVE didn’t leave my life. In fact, it was flooding in and swirling around me, coming from every direction. As it spilled out from my own heart, others were pouring it back into me endlessly. I’ve never felt such immense kindness, support and, yes, love. My heart has never felt so many things at once, but because of everything I was being given, the love flowing into my life was greater by far than any “love" leaving it, and let’s be honest, what was leaving wasn’t really love. Love brought me the chance for a new beginning, a fresh start and the opportunity to create an even better life; the one I always knew I was capable of having. 

I’ve been inspired to focus on all of the ways love is present in my life and to intentionally grow and nurture them all throughout the course of this year and beyond. I did a program last year (shout out to Rock Your Bliss with Jacki Carr and Mary Beth LaRue) that asked me to explore my values and one of them is LOVE. I was asked to define it in my own way and my definition of love is this: “Treating myself and others with great care and allowing myself to receive it in return.” Simple yet meaningful. So, how will I honor this and intentionally put it into action this year?

I am taking the opportunity to “fill my cup”. It has been running on E for a long time, and I can’t be the best mom, friend and overall human that I can be if I’m not showing some love to myself. How can I expect to do all of the great things in this world that I feel called to do if I’m running on fumes? I can’t. To keep my tank full, there are certain things I need to make sure I’m prioritizing. 

First and foremost, my health. To me, that means taking care of my body and mind with consistent exercise, healthy foods, quality sleep, meditation and mindfulness practices. When these things exist in balance in my life, absolutely everything else flows so much better. My health is the cornerstone of being able to live the life I want. If I can’t function well physically and mentally, everything else crumbles. 

Another key component is setting (and sticking to) clear boundaries. This means boundaries with people, my time, my resources, my space and my energy. It means getting very clear on who has access to my life and when by saying “no” to the people and things that do not serve or support me right now. I commit to saying “yes” only when it feels like a “hell yes”. It means knowing when I need time alone and when I need time with others and respecting those needs.

Most important of all, loving myself means trusting my instincts and listening to what my gut is telling me. The voice inside has been screaming at me for years and I have muffled her attempts to tell me something was wrong. I vow to finally give her the respect she deserves and this year, I trust her to lead me into the life I was truly meant to live. I believe that, given the space she needs, she will work harmoniously with the Universe to direct my path and that feels so freeing and exciting. Something else that feels equally important right now is having the ability to offer myself forgiveness and grace and know that we all make mistakes and we all fail. These are just opportunities to learn and grow and evolve and I intend to take it easier on myself when things don’t go exactly as planned. 

If I show up for myself, I will be able to show up for others and be the best version of myself for them. I will be able to shine as a mother by showing my daughter what it looks like to prioritize taking care of yourself and why it’s so important. This might be the greatest lesson I could ever teach her about being a woman. I will show her that love exists in many forms and doesn’t only manifest itself romantically. Sometimes it looks like belly laughing with your best friends. Sometimes it looks like pouring yourself into your passions. Other times it looks like spending time alone. It can look like helping others who need your support. Love truly is all around and I aim to keep it front and center as my guide through 2020. I commit to keeping my heart open to possibility without bitterness or resentment. Love is not the enemy after a heartbreak. Love is the answer. Love for yourself, love for the people in your life who lift you up and care for you, love for your work, love for the world… there is so much beauty ahead and I am ready to embrace it all with open arms and a willing heart.